Objective Structured Clinical Examination, osce which i just googled just now hee. osce is like a mock exam mostly conducted for health practitioner, vet, medics, about others im not so sure. so, my osce was scheduled right after my test 2 but suddenly virology which is the last subject for test 2 is postponed just in one night ! when a test is postpone for more than two time make us play around and increase our final-paper-syndrome, which is a soul threatening, bilala exam nak habis ni..

so, by hook or by crook, i must change my mindset that my final paper is viro and not osce anymore, must change my game plan, start studying for osce first, after finish osce then we go back to viro. it's aren't easy. which i actually got less than three days to study for osce. osce plays a big part of our curriculum, because it carry big carry mark, second, its our very first doctor-ly-practical-examination; how you will talk with your client, how you wanna deal your patient, your profesionalism, everything is tested here, you must present yourself as the DOCTOR, NOT STUDENT ANYMORE, NADA. third, of course i wanna pass!
first day of-osce-preparation, is on saturday which the university is having merentas kampus or cross country run. either i wanna stay in room and study for osce all day long or make use of the bright sky while preparing ?? finally i chose  to get up and head out of my room, if i stay there longer i'll be more anxious. but that day, i decided not to run like i used to do, but just walk while revising patient history taking until the finishingline. thank god, got classmate to spend the walk together! people who walked passing us gave weird look.. apa pula tanya-tanya pasal kucing ingat ni klinik ke? huhu. we're still sane people no worries. after finished and went back to college we capture two cats to practice animal handling plak. again got another weird eyes looking at us. huhu. practice and keep on practicing until malam. malam guna elmo pula for practice.
second day, practice and keep practice until 10pm. i need to stop. relax and calm myself. 'fadhilah, you need yourself a sleep, tomorrow patient dont want to see your bulging eyebag eventhough its permanent.:P then, that night, is the night that i ironed my white coat  for the first time ever. would never forget.

and the day come. i am sooo grateful that my name on among the first session. i dont like waiting for exam really want to finish is asap. penantian satu penyiksaan okayy . got four station, each station i only have four minutes to fnish all the task! and the voice break the silence, next station please. go fadh! my turn came.

first station was the histoy taking. i was soooo shocked, i tried my best to hide it, hoping the client not realised it too. i realised i took some time, quite long, to read the case. it was a piglet case! i actually just practice about swine minutes before i went in, not the days before! tanya je la fadh relax.. so i started. i was stuttered to say 'piglet' because im afraid i identify the animal wrongly! when you nervous you cant even distinguish which is pig which is dog! thank god, im not wrong, it is piglet. and to be honest, its the client that accidently enlightened me about whats the piglet problem when i was still blurry because i felt like almost fainting in the examination room. im still like, me now a doctor? waa. when the client said 'diarrhea' when answering my question, it snap me back to real world. i couldnt finish my history taking in the 4 minutes provided, so i tried to end it as polite as i could.huhu because being rude is automatic failure!

move on to second and third stage, i felt better alhamdulillah. but it came to final stage, which is the large animal ward, stepped into the examination area, alamak prof. ni..the strict one. the task is to identify the rate of rumen sound. what is rumen? one of the ruminant stomach compartment.. what is ruminant?..can google hee  the goat was nice with me at first, but when almost one minute, it started to move around so i just released it exactly after one minute of ausculting. then, i reported that i heard two rumen sound in one minute which indicates that it is normal. and the prof asked me again,' so just spent for one minute?' i just answered with big eyes of confidence 'yes' but i actually release it because i dont want to stress it anymore, i know i need to hear it for another one minute why i can't answer like that fluentttt because i was so nervous facing that prof. then, prof. said 'ok' so i left. i left with feeling that i would failed that station. i dont have mood anymore for anything else. i really on mood swing. i dont even took picture before going back because i was sooo frustrated. then, i went straight to ioi alone, and had boat noodle as much as i could huhu. leave the rest to Him. Allah knows best.

just a snap before i went in

last thursday, the osce result was out, alhamdulillah i passed. i-actually-passed. instead of all my frust and some tantrums huhu. and we have to go back to virology test 2 two days after the result, which was on friday. and i just had one day left to prepare.

alhamdulillah, today i just finished my virology practical test. and tomorrow got immunology quiz plak.

 passing a test is important for me because the result shows how's my attitude toward my education and knowledge. if i really put an effort thats the outcome, otherwise if i dont, the outcome might be bad.  faham tak? hee.. it's something that need to ponder. but there's a point, when we've put effort, but still not getting what we want.. that's another situation. im gonna write about it soon.
no matter how hard your study is.. keep the ball rolling, you're making life as the best version.
and



the hardest pathway is indeed the most beautiful! make one yours.